Technology

(In response to Texting)

There isn't much that separates humans from animals. We all eat, sleep, need water, chase females, and die. It's the circle of life. The reason though why we humans are destroying the world with such efficiency is twofold. For starters, we have thumbs. Thumbs are great! Thumbs allow us to pick up teacups and stick a pinky out while drinking from them.

Look at me, I'm a prick!

The other thing we got going for us that animals don't? Technology. Thats what really separates us from those toy poodles that mindlessly hump your leg. Technology has allowed us to build cities, find cures to diseases, and make Cher look like an alien!

We still don't know if she comes in peace...

Despite all the great things technology has done for the human race, there are still those people who lash out against it. There are those people that say pollution caused by the human race is going to kill polar bears and melt big chunks of ice, because you know ice doesn't naturally melt when it gets warm and all. These are the same people that say computers and phones and Facebook have not brought us together, but farther apart. You know what I call those people? Hippies.

I hope when the Chinese invade they kill the hippies first

Technology has made the world small! Technology has made everyones lives better and more interconnected! You want to see pictures of your cousins newborn baby, but they live across the country? They can just email you pictures! You want to keep in touch with your significant other on the go? Cellphones! You want to see a gigantic panda fart? Youtube!

The only way to make technology better and to make people more connected is to have more technology. You have a computer? Not good enough, you also need a laptop, a tablet, and a smartphone. You only have one TV? Not good enough. You need atleast three and 4000 HD channels to go on it. You only have one bluetooth headset in your ear at all times? Weak shit son, you need two!

There is too much win for words in this picture

You aren't truly connected unless you have a Flickr account open on your computer, are texting with atleast three people on your phone, watching Netflix on your TV, and have at least a Facebook and Twitter account open (and if you are a pedophile, a Myspace account) all at the same time! You know what enhances talking to someone in person? Talking to them through Skype, IN THE SAME ROOM! You know why it enhances it? Because technology is awesome! Don't be an animal, be human, and use as much technology as possible!